Sunday, January 30, 2011

Today=OBSESSED!

I don't know what happened from yesterday to today, but my outlook changed drastically.  I woke up feeling so discouraged.  I didn't want to get out of bed.  I prayed for a long time and asked God to give us a sign.  I spent most of the day just curled up in a blanket on the couch.  I took a 90 minute nap.  And...I Googled pregnancy symptoms in the meantime.

I'm not good with surprises.   I like to know exactly how things are going to pan out.  I went grocery shopping today and I stood by the pregnancy tests asking for the strength to not buy one.  I didn't.  I was kind of proud of myself.  I know that a negative test wouldn't make me feel any worse because I would know that it was really early and didn't mean much.  But, a positive test would definitely make me feel better.  Oh well!  Praying for strength and patience. 

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